dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
He shit in the fireplace
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
