redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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