Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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