In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
