I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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