i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
