So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
