Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
