He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
