there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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