I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
