You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
