i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
