dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
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