And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
