Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
40s are totally the cure
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
