Joe is yelling at the trees again.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
