At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Less talking, more tequila
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Randomize