we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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