Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
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