She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
