It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
