Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I will be naked everywhere
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
