No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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