Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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