so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
