I just threw up on my dentist
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
