I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
