Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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