girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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