So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
