How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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