i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
