Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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