his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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