I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
