i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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