FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
