I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
