I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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