i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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