you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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