You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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