Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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