FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Is it penis luge time yet?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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