She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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