I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize