brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
420 ftw
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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