normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
can u get pink eye on your cock?
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
