i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize