508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
