Heybabeimwearingurpanties
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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